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Thursday, August 11, 2016

Rhys' Writing Introduction

WALT: use language features like similes and onomatopoeia in our writing to add impact. 

This is the opening hook that Rhys has written, he has been working on show not tell and including language features to add impact.


I heard a footstep on the ground squash it was getting closer. I turned around then I saw a big flash like lightning. I turned one more time and I saw him,  it moved its hips back and I knew the cheater was about to pounce.

3 comments:

  1. Awesome describing words Rhys.. can't wait to read more!

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  2. Awesome describing words Rhys.. can't wait to read more!

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  3. I liked the example Rhys used to explain his learning. Teaching was carefully crafted and this student had an opportunity to write to a high standard.

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Thank-you for your positive, thoughtful, helpful comment.